I promise he is not conceited.
One day long ago, I was being all question-y. I asked him, "Who do you think is the perfect couple?" This is an odd question for me to ask as I do not think there is a perfect couple out there but I really wanted to know what his ideal was when it came to relationships. He took his time in responding and said, "us". Really?!? He said if he was not us, he would want to be us.
Wow, I was floored. And this conversation keeps creeping back up into my mind lately.
We don't ever fight. Crazy but true. We disagree and talk it out. We talk and I think that's the biggest argument saver out there. Communication. Not just communicating but talking, orally, face to face. None of this text message bull crap. Yes - we've sent each other text messages but those are usually silly, miss you texts. I'm talking conversationally, we talk.
For that, we always know what the other wants and expects. We don't hide anything from each other. If I get irritated with him, I do tend to hold it in longer than needed and it tends to fume up until I cannot take it anymore. I usually get really annoyed and beat about whatever it is and then I will a) tell him about it and/or b) tell someone else about it. I'm working on deleting (b) out of my life. Its just not fair to him. I'm also working on letting (a) out of the bag a lot sooner. It's not fair to either of us.
We talk, we connect. There are no arguments over who washes dishes or cleans bathroom. Our bill situation is we pay it if it's in our name. I pay the electric, he pays the cable. We share a money market account that we both talked about and agreed upon a number to contribute equally. Either one of us will do laundry when we're in the mood. Our only rule is not two weekends in a row. He had to go buy more underwear for that ruling. We have sex everyday. We kiss each other hello and goodbye. I cook. He cooks. We have two televisions, an Xbox and a super duper computer. We're on the same page about kids and marriage. We don't disrespect each other. We will not name call. We vowed not to start a fight in public or in front of friends/family. If one of us is in a drunken stupor and the other is not, we leave it alone. Our cell phones call each other if we think we are going to be late, missed or stuck.
I list these things out because this is what I hear other couples arguing about. Sometimes I get it, sometimes I don't. Half the couple fights my friends tell me about, I think could have been prevented if one of them knew what the other wanted or expected.
It's not like we made a list of things and agreed upon them all in one sitting. And this did not come to be overnight.
What happened was we talked each and every time the other one of us brought it up. We talked it out when one of us needed to let the other know what we needed and wanted. We came to understandings. We came to be a perfect us.
And with all my heart I think we'll be talking until we cannot talk anymore.