Do you know what happens to you when you start drinking at 10am?
You're tipsy at eleven. You're drunk by noon. Crazy drunk at three. Starving at five. And ready to see your bed at eight.
And we weren't just celebrating St.Patty's Day - I'm an aunt-sorta.
My very good friend had her baby girl yesterday morning and since I was partying with most of her and her husband's friends - we did as Irish do and drank up to that as well.
FYI: The baby is presh - gorgeous. I love love love her. She is too cute.
And so the drinking began. I made some kick ass bloody marys. It was breakfast and what else are you suppose to drink that early? Mimosas are too frou frou. Give me the vodka and lets kick into high gear.
Being tipsy and in a cab van with nine people is so much fun. I didn't even remember I was in Dallas at one point during the cab ride. Where I thought I was, I have no idea.
Luckily we ended at the house party quick enough for me to get my bearings straight.
I'm just gonna say this, so its out there: HELLO! - there were some hot boys in Dallas! I finally found them and where they hang out. Too bad most of them were around the age of 25, but cute nonetheless.
And I'm sunburned. How? I have no idea. My forehead and nose look the same as they did when I came back from the Mexico trip. And it hurts to scrunch my nose.
After an hour of partying it up. Me and another found ourselves particularly starving. So we ordered a pizza. Because who the heck has a houseparty with no food? Not even a chip or a dip. Just kegs. And yes, I know we were there to drink but come on - some bread at least to soak it up would've been nice. At least.
Whiff of our pizza brought in a crowd. We had to hide behind a car - like a threesome of vagabonds scarfing it down. People still found us. And the pizza meant for three became pissa for six. I hate sharing when I'm hungry and drunk.
We eventually moved onto the street party. (I think thats when the sunburning began) Seriously we were just standing in the street, surrounded by drunkasses and cops while drinking. Thank goodness someone got bored of the idea and we started walking. We found a sketchy party to crash. FUN times.
And when I say sketchy believe me: SKETCHY.
Moving on, we drank their beer for a couple of hours and moved on down to lower Greenville to eat. I cannot remember the name of the Chinese restaurant because at this point I was at my drunkest and loudest. I think we were the entertainment at the sit down restaurant. Families were scared of us. I remember eating the best shrimp toast ever and seeing grains of rice scattered in front of me - not on a plate, just scattered. It was one of those places that has a lazy susan in the middle of the table for all to share the food. I think I pushed it too hard at one point because someone was bogarting the orange chicken. And like I said, I don't like to share when I'm drunk and hungry.
We hit one more bar, I danced a lot, and then it was time to go home. The sun had set and I swear it felt like two in the morning. Once back at my car, where I left my phone (yeah I work for a jeweler and don't own a watch) I saw that it was only eight. WTF?
That's how it goes when you start at 10am.