I don't need a man. But, do I want one?
More and more each day, Hotlanta gets to my heart just as much as he gets on my nerves. If he could back down on the constant 'in my business' inquiries, he'd be all good. Then he does or says something that gets to my heart and his crazy needs to know what I'm doing and who I am with, go away.
But let me tell you: HE IS NOT MY BOYFRIEND.
He lives in Atlanta. Boo. But he makes me want to find someone just like him, in Dallas (proper). Is that odd?
People move. Yeah, I know. I cannot justify this long distance relationship to last long ,to know that one of us needs to move. And I am so against moving state to state or city to city when you only know one person and that person is your significant other. I just see problems with that. Unless there is a ring on your finger.
Back to the situation: Want versus Need.
I honestly believe that God did not create everyone to be married. Some people are destined to be married. Some, aren't. I don't think its everyone's purpose and some people should stop acting like its their life to find a permanent mate. (you know the type) Maybe that's not your or my purpose on Earth.
It's just the way it is and makes sense to me.
I don't need a man. I can have a child minus the man. I can be successful minus the man. I can own a house, a car, pay the bills, live life without one. So far, I have and I'm good. What do you need a man for, really?
And I understand that someone will answer: Sex, duh. I'm not talking physical stuff here because if I just wanted that, I could go out and get that, easy, minus the relationship or drama.
Do I want one?
Maybe. I go back and forth on it all the time.
It'd be nice for the validation. Oh holey that validation. Validation will be the end of me. Can't you tell?
It'd be nice for the kissing.
It'd be nice for the date-paying and companionship (to the movies, the bookstore, restaurants, etc).
Oh and it'd be extra nice to cook for someone besides myself (but I can cook for friends--they might not show or answer the text, but hey, we're talking technicalities)
It'd be especially nice to share this football obsession with one. Partner went so far. And I doubt he'd be up for the kissing--eh, I wouldn't be up for that with him. Gross. (I am not one of those straight girls that kisses her gay male friends. Unh unh)
I'd really want one to be lazy and tangled up on the couch with, watching mindless Sunday television (while not in football season).
Do I want one, do I need one? Crap. Crap.
Want may win out. Especially since I just created my (project) and really, isn't the end result of that, a man?
I don't want to sound hypocritical.
But I sure as hope that I'm the type that doesn't need one.
Wanting is nice but shouldn't be confused with the need.