Friday, October 6

So...

My brain hurts. I'm stressed out. I cannot make big decisions without analyzing each scenario to death.
It's not that Job A* is better than Job B, per se. I think this would happen with any job offered to me.

How can I say this: I got lazy during these past 2 months. And a wee bit scared.
I believe that I grew so accustomed and comfortable with staying at home and having all this time to me. I did some soul searching; learned how to truly be alone; fixed up my apartment; tried out some great recipes; and traveled. It's been an extended vacation, to say the least.

And I'm scared to leave and go back into the working world. Let's face it, the last time I was out there: my personality, skills, work, and talent were chewed up and spat out like garbage. Will I succeed or fail, again?
That is what scares me the most.

I've had the success with past jobs. Then took something that I was so excited to have and my energy for it was through the roof (the perks, alone, had me glowing with glee) and they didn't like me. Or approve of me.
It hurt. It was like a break up.
And like any break up, you need to mourn it, in order to move on. That's where I have been the past two months mourning the Law Firm. Am I ready to get back out there?

And have myself vulnerable, again? Am I ready for a new relationship? Even though it doesn't look or come packaged up like what I'm dreaming of...but hey, what does?
I can take it and make the most of it. Yes, if another comes along, I can quit it. Or break up with it.

It seems like all of life is like this. Just relationship after relationship. Break-up after break up. Until you find your One. Happiness.

*I still have yet to make a decision, but thank you so much for all your advice, XOXOs to all of you!

1 comment:

Swishy said...

Changing our routine always sucks. You'll do great, no matterw which one you choose. You will!