Smokin'

I used to smoke (cough).
Way back in the day when I went to UT-Austin, that is. I blame peer pressure. Well there wasn't that much pressure but everyone was doing it, so why the hell not, I thought.
This addiction led to two things: My clothes stank and now my brother is a smoker. He really looked up to me, the cool older sister I was back in the day.
I have long quit. My brother has not followed my footsteps in that direction.
I never smoke sober. Yes, I have had the midnight cigarette; what else accessorizes your fifth martini?
I think it's gross and have to pretend I am some cool person from the sixties to actually stand the idea. OK-I'll admit-I have to pretend I'm Holly Golightly and that I look quelle-cool smoking. Yes, I am a nerd.
Today it didn't matter if I looked cool or not because I was pissed off.
My co-worker decided today was the day that he was going to boss me around. Uhm hmm and knowing me I don't put up with that shit. Buuuuuuuuuut since I have been out with him socially on more than one occasion, I put up with it. I don't know why I do, I just do. I think it's because I want peace in the office and also still want to hang out with him outside the office. I think he takes advantage of me because I am so nice to him and we hang out. I should have seen this day coming.
There went that because he has crossed the line. He is my equal and there is no need to boss me around because he is unhappy. Yeah, I think that's the other cause. He is 30, single, and at an entry level position for five years. WTF?!?! Plus, I noticed today that he only does it when our manager is not here in the office or she is away from her desk and away from ear shot.
Imagine this, if you can, in the midst of his bossing me around, my overly-dramatic mother calls. Her car caught on fire minutes after she got out of it.

"[DAUGHTER] MY CAR WAS ON FIRE AND THE POLICE, FIRE DEPARTMENT, AND HIGHWAY PATROL WERE OUT HERE! ON FIRE---GOD HAS HIS EYES ON ME TODAY. I HAVE TO GO TO CHURCH TONIGHT. ALL THE TRAFFIC HAS STOPPED BECAUSE THE CAR WAS ON FIRE. I'M SO EMBARRASSED. DID I MENTION THAT THE POLICE, FIRE DEPARTMENT, AND HIGHWAY PATROL WERE OUT HERE?"

Holy Fuck!
This causes me stress because my mom has a brand new car and she keeps driving her older car (sentimental?!?) as not to put the miles on her new car. Does this make sense? This is what I get to look forward to in my later years. I cannot wait.
I have her screaming/crying that God is watching over her and I have him leering over my shoulder to make sure work is completed.
So I smoked.