Holy Crap--what was I sucked into last night? First I saw a mini-Charlotte York and Future Whore of America plan their outrageous Sweet 16 Birthday party. They tried to get Beyonce to perform but a half million dollars stopped that. When did turning sixteen become a huge production? I nearly peed my pants when my parents took me to the Red Lobster for my 16th. That was the highlight of the year for me. Those two bitches were stressing over looking alike--that dress was so much more cuter on mini-Charlotte. Then, oh gosh, how to contain my excitement: Landon and Shavonda hooked up much to Karamo's disapproval. Then he said out loud that he would slit Landon's throat. WTF? We already know he is a hater of interracial-ness and only sees color/race when he walks down the street; but this is not Lord of the Flies--you are in Fiji and on MTV; so you will never have to work again, so, get over yourself and let's get some more shots of Landon's fine tanned body---yum. Can you blame the grown ass woman for hooking up with that?
Then there was another episode of Super Sweet 16; this time the birthday girl invited her school crush who was not so hot and was in desperate need of a haircut. The best part was her mom--who insisted on mardi-gras beads and taking shots all night long...that's when I saw my future as a mother.